Homophobia

I had an interesting and educational interaction on Twitter today. Of course, being Twitter, it was lost of miscommunication and anger. Much of this was probably my fault.

I want to do two things with this post. Explain what my original point was trying to be and then say why it was a total failure on my part.

First, the intent.

Someone posted an opinion that using homosexual sex acts as an attempt to demean Donald Trump and his relationship with Putin was straight homophobia. I replied that it was more about dominance and submission than about homophobia and perhaps not everything that could be about a minority group is about a minority group.

I still believe that to be true.

The reason I brought it up is because it reinforces a damaging negative stereotype. Every time, the stereotype goes, that someone who is part of an aggrieved minority group gets disagreed with they trot out their catchphrase, be it homophobia, racism, misogyny, or whatever.

Ironically I was immediately labeled homophobic.

Eventually I came to realize, in some part due to the conversation, why I was failing to communicate my idea.

Part two, my failure.

Apart from the possibility of being wrong, which is always a possibility with me, I failed to take some serious factors into account. First, LGBT people have been attacked for so long from so many directions, I can see why they might assume it's just another attack. If a thousand people walk up and punch you in the face, you don't assume person 1,001 is offering you chocolates.

The LGBT community has suffered enough damage that it is not right to ask them to be the bigger party and accept what could be considered (and certainly in some cases was intended to be) an insult in order to defeat a negative stereotype.

It's up to me and people like me.

So, my apologies. It was at the very least an awkward way to communicate something and at the worse end of the spectrum, a shitty thing to say.